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Ballad of the Effects Pedals ©

(If you are not a Guitarist between the ages of 35-55, this may mean nothing.)

Danny Reynolds
Dalton in Furness, England
2005

Sweet Muse of inspirational harmony,
I know that you’re nay minger,
Coz ye let me play, ma ain Twin Leads,
On a Dan-electro Green-Ringer.

You might be wee, but you’re nay Dug,
No even a Chihuahua.
Your soulful tears, have reached ma ears,
Through ma old Cry-baby Wah-Wah.

I can’t say enough, about your Big Muff,
That gives ma clean sound, distress.
I’ll put ma Banja, through your wee Flanger,
My sweet, Electric Mistress.

Your generosity knows nay bounds,
Ye’d never be called a Miser.
Wi sweeps and bows, highs and lows,
Our Graphic Equaliser.

Lift our spirits, past the clouds,
Tay the Land o' Ultrasonics,
Who says ye canny write a poyum,
Around “Electro-Harmonix?”

There’s some as would,
Think this poyum crude.
But a think that ye will find.
If you see a leaning, tay a hidden meaning,
Well that’s just your dirty mind!


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