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You Are Not True ©

Lucia Mussollini
Edinburgh, Scotland

Lucia, Lucia, if I shake you, will you wake?
Will you see, what it is, I want us to make?
Together, a life, a beautiful dream
But, I guess, even if I talk to you now
You still won't see what it means
Why must you break my heart this way?
Never hearing or truly listening to what it is I have to say
Why must you punish me for feeling your pain?
You don't want to know, that I feel the same
You can't bring yourself to listen to the loving words that I have
You deny me even truth, while you play with your tumbling cards
I see everything, you try to hide
What scares you most is I've been there, inside
Your heart and your mind
And I know, what is there to find

Oh, dear lover, you're wrong, we don't sing the same song
I was just playing games, with you, all along
I am not scared and I am not in pain
I am just splashing and playing in the sodding rain
You say that this game, that you helped to create
Is just a shield, a game of hate
How wrong can you be, you don't really see
That I am no toy, no puppet on a string
To pick up and discard, like a dangerous plaything
But a person with love and a person with hate
And you denied me true words, which continue to grate
All you aim to do is protect you and you
And, as you watch my life fall apart
Since you handed me over, to those with no heart
Your guilt is eroding the walls in your life
And you now look with dejection at your poor and sad wife

No, my Lucia, I see through your hate
I see that this fašade is to hide what you slate
And your cynicism is your fear transposed into a shield
You love me with depth so deep, it makes you yield
Give in and give up that which holds you down
Love me the way that you know won't make you frown
For it is I, who will free you, it is I who knows
The way, the life, which will make us both grow
Let me take you, hand in hand, to our unique and beautiful land
Where all is not certain, all is not free
But, where everything is there, for you and me
To be at peace and content to love freely, it is meant
Not in fate, not inevitably, but through want
I know that you too see it clearly

Oh, your words are so certain, and you're truly a beautiful man
But if I knew this then, what is it that made me run
Is it fear, when I fear not more powerful and influential men
Is it loss, no it is not, for loss is not something you take or you leave
Loss is just there, just the same when I grieve
No, it's betrayal, it is trust, which prevents me from doing what you say, I must
It's your actions, not your words, it's your movement, back and forth
And trust is the thing which does not quite exist
Trust is the thing which creates such dank mist
To lose, what little I have left, to leave me even more bereft
You have offered so little and asked for so much
It is sad that you think I am little more than dust
For if truth be known, it is you who has shown
Just how little this means, it split so easily at the seams
It is you who is guilty, it is you who does not love
It is you who's destroying me, as you push and you shove
When at last you speak the truth, it is then I will listen
When you set me free, only then my eyes again will glisten

My darling, how sad and alone you make me feel
As though on this planet there is not left any humanity
My heart is dictating my life and my work
You must stop hating yourself and let me love
Let me caress and console that which makes you cajole
My most intense and profound broken heart, my whole
I cannot go on like this anymore
But you must set me free, with those words which you have
Finally admit that you loved me completely
Only then will I know what it is again to be free

Oh, how wrong and how sad, but I do not feel too bad
For I loved you it's true, but you betrayed me and lied
And for that I detest, I cannot hide
More myself than you
But be gone now, with her
You are not true

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